A Journey Commences.

I'm sure there are those amongst us, who can look to a place and time and say, "that is where it began for me".  A single moment when 'it' happened, when the spiritual light went on.  When all of those little clues finally pieced together.  A Eureka moment.   Mine was a gradual realisation over many many years.  A maturation process if you will.  As a young boy I was indoctrinated into religion, that's where you find your faith, that's what it's all about.  I learned about Christ, God, the Bible etc etc and it was just there.  I was brought up in the opt in opt out Church of England.  Not a very demanding church to be in.  As good friends would say, we only attended for 'hatching, matchings and dispatching'....  Flippant, but ohh, so so true.

Years went by and when ever I was asked, "what religion are you", it was easy to put C of E and move on.  The whole Church thing never sat right with me, but I never knew why.  Nor did I try to reason why, it never seemed that interesting.  Years went by and at a single major pivotal point in my life, I started to believe.  It was 1991 and what a bloody year that was, not much more could have gone wrong for me.  Most tragic of all the events, and there were four, was the loss of my young sister to breast cancer.  At that moment, I turned to religion for help, actually a crutch.  Essentially, I didn't start going to Church, I thought that was hypocritical.  I chose to believe in my own way, God became 'the Big Fella' and I would just chat to him.   Then I was caught up in the whole mystic 'thing' of religion.  If I wavered now, something would go wrong!  They had me with fear, but I didn't know it then.

More years went by.  I prayed less, stopped asking for things, or was not aware I had ceased doing so.  Instead, I resorted to believing basic words of wisdom.  The sort of home spun wisdom that we associate with our parents and grandparents.  Words of wisdom that I gathered on sales training courses.  These seemed to resonate with me.  These were simple messages intended for a sales force audience.  What seemed so blindingly obvious to me, was the 'big picture' meaning and how these words affected our whole lives.  Without thinking about it, I pushed orthodox religion further away.  Well, I was C of E, I could opt in opt out as I pleased.

Now we start getting up to date.  Nearly a year ago, my daughter Gemma received an article from her Mum about animal communication.  She read it and was instantly drawn to the subject.  Her enthusiasm was infectious and I hung on every word about this new concept in her life.  Being a good dad, I wanted to support her what ever she was doing, but found the whole premiss behind animal communication fascinating.  I then started to see the bigger picture, and how spirituality was at work here.  As Gemma and I spoke, mostly via Skype, I found myself offering more and more 'words of wisdom'.  More often than not, I wondered where they had come from!  Gemma seemed to take notice of my advice, or at least toss it into the melting pot for consideration.

Over the last few months, there has been a real sea change in how I looked at things, belief in particular. A fundamental catalyst to this change, was when my ten year old my Grandson Deryn was diagnosed with Leukemia.  The initial diagnosis hit like a thunderbolt.  We were all devastated, well, all except Deryn!  My daughter in-law Callie, immediately worked out that Deryn would feed from hers and my sons anxiety - if there was any.  At that moment, Callie and Simon whether through conscious effort  or otherwise, set about projecting nothing but a positive outcome for Deryn.  There were soon people all over the world through social networking sites who had never met this little chap, but were none the less pouring out love for him.  That amazed me!  The next thing that struck me was how this little chaps illness, had brought us all together, spiritually.  Then I started to analyse my own belief and the game was on!

Deryn had acted as a conduit, bringing us all together in a common cause.  Then I realised that this had happened before in our family, when my sister had passed over in 1991.  Those of us who were open to the idea, realised that Pammy was bringing us together and was looking out for us.  So much so, that to this day I occasionally call my daughter Gemma, Pammy, and visa versa!  Now I believed that Pammy, in spirit, was indeed looking after us, or guiding us.  At about the same time, my son Simon was also going through something of a belief renaissance.  He had tried orthodox church and found it wanting.  Again there was control and rule through fear.  Callie had always been a spiritualist and so guided Simon, who soon discovered this was the right way for him.  Now things were really moving.